Finding connection through the “Wednesday Waffle”
Staying close to faraway friends during the first year at MIT
When I first came to MIT, I was confident that I’d had a decent plan for building a meaningful social life for myself at MIT and in Cambridge/Boston more broadly. Student groups, hobby groups, one-off events, and department outings were all readily available. Even without stepping out of the MIT bubble, there were so many avenues to socialize—surely some friendships would arise? Well, yes and no. Yes, I did eventually find community, but the timescale for doing so was almost a year—much longer than I had anticipated. During this transition year, my closest contacts were actually thousands of miles away. Having gone to the same undergraduate institution, we now congregate on WhatsApp, most recently in a format called the Wednesday Waffle.
The Wednesday Waffle is an online trend, recently promoted by Instagram user Kirx Diaz, who discussed feeling alone while navigating life in a new city and trying to stay in touch with friends he had left behind. In an effort to connect with old friends and revive his rarely active group chat, he suggested that they commit to a ‘Wednesday Waffle.’ In British slang, the term ‘waffle’ means “to talk or write a lot without giving any useful information or any clear answers.” Kirx proposed that every Wednesday, everyone in the group sends a two-minute voice note about what is happening in their life, how they are feeling, what they cooked for dinner—anything really, meaningful or aimless, foolish or profound—essentially, a short waffle. In my small group chat of four people scattered across the world, we decided to give the Wednesday Waffle a shot, and I am so glad that we did.
Before this waffle, the other ways we maintained contact were (1) a long Zoom call for an in-depth check-in once a month and (2) sharing memes and photos of things we found funny—with no pressure for engagement. The beauty of the Wednesday Waffle is that it has become the perfect in-between medium of communication, bridging the chaotic memes and hours-long discussions about the state of the world and our lives. Now, every Wednesday, I’m able to share a small piece of my life as a PhD student at MIT and hear responses to, and perspectives on, my experiences. I also get to hear about the amazing communities and careers my friends occupy as we jointly navigate this phase of our lives (and occasionally also hear siblings yell in the background). This is something I have held onto, even as I have made friends locally.
For me, the collective richness of the online community that we have built in this simple chat was a crucial social lifeline during that first year when I had limited community at MIT. As an international student, moving to Cambridge meant crossing physical spaces and multiple time zones. For many, this can make staying in contact infinitely harder, whether because of schedule conflicts or planning inertia. But I would encourage everyone, especially new international students whose network may span the globe, to find a way to maintain their distant connections. Whether through the Wednesday Waffle or otherwise, that distant community may be the one you need the most as you start your journey here in Cambridge.
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